 | Alabama At Least We're not Mississippi |
| Alaska Firearms, Booze And Onanism |
| Arizona Dehyd-rific! |
| Arkansas We Must Be Doing Something Awfully WRONG Here! |
| California As Seen on TV |
| Colorado Rocky Mountain Oysters and Bloody Beer! |
| Connecticut A Safe Refuge From New York |
| Delaware Aaaahh... |
| Florida Ask Us About Our Grandkids |
| Georgia We Put the "Fun" in Fundamentalist Extremism |
| Hawaii Haka Molaha'ai Lekiluku (Drink, Play Golf, Shop, Go Home) |
| Idaho More Than Just Potatoes... Well Kinda... |
| Illinois Where Ill and Noise Meet |
| Indiana 2 Billion Years Tidal Wave Free |
| Iowa Land of James T. Kirk |
| Kansas First Of The Rectangle States |
| Kentucky Five Million People; Fifteen Last Names |
| Louisiana We're Not All Drunk Cajun Wackos... Yet |
| Maine Cheap Lobster |
| Maryland A Thinking Man's Delaware |
| Massachusetts We Talk Funny |
| Michigan First Line of Defense From the Canadians |
| Minnesota If You Can Live Here, You Can Live On The Moon! |
| Mississippi Come Drink our Mighty Waters |
| Missouri Your Federal Flood Relief Tax Dollars at Work |
| Montana Land of the Big Sky, the Unabomber, and Very Little Else |
| Nebraska Corn, College Football and Basketball; We Suck |
| Nevada Sturdy Whores and Stud Poker! |
| New Hampshire Go Away and Leave Us Alone |
| New Jersey A ##$%##! Motto? I Got Yer ##$%##! Motto Right Here! |
| New Mexico Where Lizards Make Excellent Pets |
| New York You Have the Right to Remain Silent... |
| North Carolina Tobacco is a Vegetable |
| North Dakota The Garden State's Compost Heap |
| Ohio Don't Judge Us by Cleveland |
| Oklahoma No Singing |
| Oregon Spotted Owl -- It's What's For Dinner |
| Pennsylvania Cook With Coal |
| Rhode Island We're Not Really An Island |
| South Carolina Conservative Is Liberal Here |
| South Dakota Closer Than North Dakota |
| Tennessee The Edyucashun State |
| Texas Another Planet |
| Utah Our Jesus Is Better Than Your Jesus |
| Vermont Damn Yankees; That's Us! |
| Virginia Who Says Government Stiffs and Slackjaw Yokels Don't Mix? |
| Washington Microsoft, Espresso and Slackers! |
| Washington, D.C. District Of Crack |
| West Virginia One Big Happy Family -- Literally! |
| Wisconsin We Cut The Nation's Cheese |
| Wyoming Why? |
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